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Sunday, December 23, 2012

And Just, Who the Hell do You Think You Are?

            Recently I’ve observed that many of the women who come into the clinic feel the need to explain to us escorts how in their situation abortion is okay, but abortion is not okay in other situations.  We’ve had mothers who think their daughters are somehow different from other women’s daughters.  I find this extremely disturbing.  Some of these women have mentioned that they are members of the Republican Party, and will vote Republican at ever opprotunity.  There is a certain type of selfishness in these comments that I can’t quite explain.
            It is as if they truly think all women, other than themselves are there because they are stupid.  Some women have actually said, "I’m not like the other women here."  I always say, "Oh Really, and how exactly are the other women here?"  I know how they are.  They are typically nice women, scared women, women who don’t want to become a parent. 
           A lot of the women who seem to think they are somehow better than the other patients, aren’t actually patients.  They are there with their precious daughters.  Their daughters, who deserve to have a safe abortion, and are somehow better than the other women who are there.  Their daughter is young and made a mistake, and she really is a good kid.  The parents say, "I don’t know how this happened.
            After talking with many of these daughters who seem to want to talk to anyone other than their mother, I have come to a conclusion.  This happened because mothers never tell their daughters how the female body works. The female body is her body, and she needs to know about it. She has never even had a pelvic exam.  She doesn’t know anything about her menstrual cycle other than it really sucks.  She doesn’t know the effectiveness of condoms.  You, dear mothers, have robbed your daughters of the ability to make informed decisions concerning their sexuality.
            Your daughter is the love of your life.  You think she is perfection; you are even able to maintain the picture of perfection you have of your daughter at the abortion clinic.  I actually think this is a good thing.  She does not need to be punished for getting pregnant or having an abortion.  She does need to have accurate information and a comprehensive sexual education.  It is good you love her enough to allow her to have an abortion, if that is what she wants.  It is good she was able to come to you.  Bravo, you’ve done a lot right for her to be able to talk to you instead of hurting herself.
            That being said, let’s get this straight.  All the women you see here.  ALL OF THEM are somebody’s daughter.  None of them are “bad” women.  Your daughter is not one iota different from them.  They deserve the same respect as you would want your daughter to have and that she deserves.  Do not tell the staff that your daughter’s abortion is “moral” because your daughter is young or because she was raped, she is not the only one.  DO NOT assume anything about the other patients.
            I don’t know who started the rumor that clinic escorts and clinic employees are there to judge patients, but for the record that isn’t the case.  The truth is many clinic employees have had an abortion and this is true of the escorts as well.  We don’t like the idea that you think we are a bunch of loose un-respectable women.  We are protective of ALL our patients, not just your daughter.  You should be really happy to know this.  We are like Momma and Daddy bears.  We will defend the rights of all our patients, and we DO NOT judge any of them.  We don’t take kindly to you judging our patients either.  This day is difficult enough without your condensation of other women who your daughter knows are just like her.  It is highly likely she isn’t giving you the entire story because she knows you’ll judge her like you do the other women sitting in the room.
            Here is something else you should know, there is probably some other mother sitting in there judging your daughter and you know what that bitch will get the same treatment for judging your daughter that you get for judging hers. We will protect your daughter as well as every other daughter entrusted to our care. I will be as professional as I can when you say, “we’re not like these other people."  I will respond with, “and exactly how are these other people?"  If you respond with, “you know," I will say, “NO, ma’am, as a matter of fact, I DO NOT.  Please, explain to me how these other people are."  Think about it.  The answer is they are just like you, so please do not judge other women who are literally just like you.
            If you’re a patient with the attitude of these mothers keep this in mind, if your own self-interest is your only concern.  If we were not here for them we would not be here for you.  If you are at an abortion clinic and you have an abortion you are a woman who has had an abortion.  This is it.  The abortion does not define who you are nor does it define who any of our other patients are.  Don’t read more into than there is.  You aren’t a horrible person for using the services offered at an abortion clinic, and neither are any of our other patients.  They are all women who don’t want to be pregnant, and that is all you know about any of them so get off it.  Do what is best for you, and don’t fill your mind with thoughts about other patients.

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